Baby Mama Drama, Part 2: Dos and Don'ts During her Pregancy

So she's pregnant. What do you do now? Well first you have to make that decision, to keep or not to keep? If you ask me, if you know that chick is a nut, don't let her be a mother. She'll just teach your child to be the same way. But I know I shouldn't condone abortion or tell you to kill your child. That's not my decision to make. But if you don't approve of abortion or she doesn't approve, be prepared to be a real parent. It's not a game.

Now, if you are in a relationship with your new Baby's Mother (we'll refer to Baby's Mother as BM from here on out), well great. If you love her and you are going to make it work, awesome. This is the easiest way at Stage 2 to avoid Baby Mama Drama (we'll refer to Baby Mama Drama as BMD from here on out).

If you are not in a relationship and do not want to be in a relationship with your new BM, there's just one thing that you must not do. DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT FUCK HER! Everyone knows that while women are pregnant, their hormones and emotions go into overdrive. She's thinking about the future and her child's life. The number one thing she wants right now is for the three of you to be one big happy family. Fucking her will only tease her. She'll think you like her enough to try to stay for the sake of the child. You are leading her on! So just don't do it. Even after the birth of the child, these feelings will linger. The best thing to do is to go find someone else to fuck if you know you don't want a relationship with this woman.

Now, I know you might be saying, "But, YHG, the pussy is so good," or "she's cool. She knows the deal." I hear you, but most women are going to change emotionally during the pregnancy. If you are still going to be stubborn and fuck her, you have to have proper fucking-but-not-loving etiquette. Don't kiss her on the mouth in public. This goes for any casual sexual relationship. You must draw the lines and let her know her place. I know she's carrying your child and that might make you want to be extra nice to her. You want to take her out and make her feel good. But you will only be leading her on by doing this. Do not take her out on dates. Don't kiss her in public. Don't hold her hand. You should just stick to late night fucking. You can talk to her on the phone or see her from time to time, but the lines must be drawn and never crossed. If you lead her on, when the baby is born, she will expect the same treatment and when she sees someone else might be getting that same treatment too...after your BM has carried your 8 pound kid for 9 months of miserable torture, she's going to go nuts.

Now what you must realize is that she's not only going to get upset, like she may have done with you in the past...she's going to get ANGRY! You don't want your window busted out of your car, BM threatening your new girlfriend so much that she leaves you, or BM not letting you see your child with out drama and police. Your BM will most likely do these things if you break her heart during the sensitive times -- during and after pregnancy.

Daddy, I suggest you lay very low under the radar. Of course be a good father. Check up on BM to make sure the bun is cooking well in that oven. Just make sure you don't cross any lines and you will be fine.

Baby Mama Drama, Part 1: Prevention.

This entry was brought to you and inspired by last week...the most horrible week of my entire life.

Lesson #1. For Goodness Sakes, put a condom on!
Now I know that sometimes accidents happen but we all know that most of the time the accident happened because of your own stupid actions. So before you tell me that the condom broke, please retrace your steps. The number one reason condoms break is due to it not being put in correctly. Get those air bubbles out of there. If you're not sure how, ask your friend or a doctor. It might be searchable on youtube for all I know. Let me go check...

This looks like a good one. Fast-Forward to 3:50 for instructions, but the whole video is pretty informative.


And hey, this video mentions to put a drop of lube in the condom for extra comfort. I hear it also makes extra pleasure...as if you were raw dogging. If you think condoms are so unbearable, just try that. Let me know if you felt much a difference and how was the experience.

Okay, so now your condom is on and everything is cool...but you just had one left over from the 3-pack you had last time. I suggest you have at least three condoms on hand before each bang session. If you're strapped for cash or condoms and only have one, well you just be extra careful because that's all you have.

I also suggest to any ladies reading, keep your own 3 pack in the purse. You know how some of these guys will purposely make no point to buy condoms so that they can be like, "Oh my bad. I didn't get any," and then because they've already spat the "I just wanna taste you" line and you're all hot and ready...chances are you're gonna be like, "Okay, but just this one time." We all know that ONE TIME is all it takes to get pregnant or worse, STDs!

So you say you and your lady are in a serious relationship. She's on birth control. Are you sure you trust her like that? I'm saying she might be cool and trustworthy and everything, but what if she is forgetful? Ever think of that? Or maybe you are relying on that trusty "pull out" method. Pulling out doesn't always work. Women can get pregnant from pre-cum. C'mon guys. They've been teaching you this since middle school!

If you are still too stubborn or on some old, "I can't cum with a condom on" stuff, please choose your sexual partner with the utmost caution, as if you are going to marry her. Technically, if she gets pregnant, you form a legally binding connection with her for at least 18 years as if you were in a marriage. But it seems like some of you pick the CRAZIEST chicks to bear your children and then blame it on an accident that happened. Thus, setting yourself up for the troubles of BABY MAMA DRAMA!